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February 21, 2006

Mr Sparkle fires up the GPS (Formulary for a New Urbanism)

Formulary for a New Urbanism

SIRE, I AM FROM THE OTHER COUNTRY

We are bored in the city, there is no longer any Temple of the Sun. Between the legs of the women walking by, the dadaists imagined a monkey wrench and the surrealists a crystal cup. That’s lost. We know how to read every promise in faces — the latest stage of morphology. The poetry of the billboards lasted twenty years. We are bored in the city, we really have to strain to still discover mysteries on the sidewalk billboards, the latest state of humor and poetry:

Showerbath of the Patriarchs
Meat Cutting Machines
Notre Dame Zoo
Sports Pharmacy
Martyrs Provisions
Translucent Concrete
Golden Touch Sawmill
Center for Functional Recuperation
Sainte Anne Ambulance
Café Fifth Avenue
Prolonged Volunteers Street
Family Boarding House in the Garden
Hotel of Strangers
Wild Street

And the swimming pool on the Street of Little Girls. And the police station on Rendezvous Street. The medical-surgical clinic and the free placement center on the Quai des Orfèvres. The artificial flowers on Sun Street. The Castle Cellars Hotel, the Ocean Bar and the Coming and Going Café. The Hotel of the Epoch.

And the strange statue of Dr. Philippe Pinel, benefactor of the insane, in the last evenings of summer. Exploring Paris.

And you, forgotten, your memories ravaged by all the consternations of two hemispheres, stranded in the Red Cellars of Pali-Kao, without music and without geography, no longer setting out for the hacienda where the roots think of the child and where the wine is finished off with fables from an old almanac. That’s all over. You’ll never see the hacienda. It doesn’t exist.

The hacienda must be built.

All cities are geological. You can’t take three steps without encountering ghosts bearing all the prestige of their legends. We move within a closed landscape whose landmarks constantly draw us toward the past. Certain shifting angles, certain receding perspectives, allow us to glimpse original conceptions of space, but this vision remains fragmentary. It must be sought in the magical locales of fairy tales and surrealist writings: castles, endless walls, little forgotten bars, mammoth caverns, casino mirrors.

These dated images retain a small catalyzing power, but it is almost impossible to use them in a symbolic urbanism without rejuvenating them by giving them a new meaning. Our imaginations, haunted by the old archetypes, have remained far behind the sophistication of the machines. The various attempts to integrate modern science into new myths remain inadequate. Meanwhile abstraction has invaded all the arts, contemporary architecture in particular. Pure plasticity, inanimate and storyless, soothes the eye. Elsewhere other fragmentary beauties can be found — while the promised land of new syntheses continually recedes into the distance. Everyone wavers between the emotionally still-alive past and the already dead future.

We don’t intend to prolong the mechanistic civilizations and frigid architecture that ultimately lead to boring leisure.

We propose to invent new, changeable decors. . . .

Darkness and obscurity are banished by artificial lighting, and the seasons by air conditioning. Night and summer are losing their charm and dawn is disappearing. The urban population think they have escaped from cosmic reality, but there is no corresponding expansion of their dream life. The reason is clear: dreams spring from reality and are realized in it.

The latest technological developments would make possible the individual’s unbroken contact with cosmic reality while eliminating its disagreeable aspects. Stars and rain can be seen through glass ceilings. The mobile house turns with the sun. Its sliding walls enable vegetation to invade life. Mounted on tracks, it can go down to the sea in the morning and return to the forest in the evening.

Architecture is the simplest means of articulating time and space, of modulating reality and engendering dreams. It is a matter not only of plastic articulation and modulation expressing an ephemeral beauty, but of a modulation producing influences in accordance with the eternal spectrum of human desires and the progress in realizing them.

The architecture of tomorrow will be a means of modifying present conceptions of time and space. It will be a means of knowledge and a means of action.

Architectural complexes will be modifiable. Their aspect will change totally or partially in accordance with the will of their inhabitants. . . .

Past collectivities offered the masses an absolute truth and incontrovertible mythical exemplars. The appearance of the notion of relativity in the modern mind allows one to surmise the EXPERIMENTAL aspect of the next civilization (although I’m not satisfied with that word; I mean that it will be more supple, more “fun”). On the bases of this mobile civilization, architecture will, at least initially, be a means of experimenting with a thousand ways of modifying life, with a view to an ultimate mythic synthesis.

A mental disease has swept the planet: banalization. Everyone is hypnotized by production and conveniences — sewage systems, elevators, bathrooms, washing machines.

This state of affairs, arising out of a struggle against poverty, has overshot its ultimate goal — the liberation of humanity from material cares — and become an omnipresent obsessive image. Presented with the alternative of love or a garbage disposal unit, young people of all countries have chosen the garbage disposal unit. It has become essential to provoke a complete spiritual transformation by bringing to light forgotten desires and by creating entirely new ones. And by carrying out an intensive propaganda in favor of these desires.

We have already pointed out the construction of situations as being one of the fundamental desires on which the next civilization will be founded. This need for total creation has always been intimately associated with the need to play with architecture, time and space. . . .

Chirico remains one of the most remarkable architectural precursors. He was grappling with the problems of absences and presences in time and space.

We know that an object that is not consciously noticed at the time of a first visit can, by its absence during subsequent visits, provoke an indefinable impression: as a result of this sighting backward in time, the absence of the object becomes a presence one can feel. More precisely: although the quality of the impression generally remains indefinite, it nevertheless varies with the nature of the removed object and the importance accorded it by the visitor, ranging from serene joy to terror. (It is of no particular significance that in this specific case memory is the vehicle of these feelings; I only selected this example for its convenience.)

In Chirico’s paintings (during his Arcade period) an empty space creates a richly filled time. It is easy to imagine the fantastic future possibilities of such architecture and its influence on the masses. We can have nothing but contempt for a century that relegates such blueprints to its so-called museums.

This new vision of time and space, which will be the theoretical basis of future constructions, is still imprecise and will remain so until experimentation with patterns of behavior has taken place in cities specifically established for this purpose, cities assembling — in addition to the facilities necessary for basic comfort and security — buildings charged with evocative power, symbolic edifices representing desires, forces and events, past, present and to come. A rational extension of the old religious systems, of old tales, and above all of psychoanalysis, into architectural expression becomes more and more urgent as all the reasons for becoming impassioned disappear.

Everyone will live in their own personal “cathedral.” There will be rooms more conducive to dreams than any drug, and houses where one cannot help but love. Others will be irresistibly alluring to travelers. . . .

This project could be compared with the Chinese and Japanese gardens of illusory perspectives [en trompe l’oeiI] — with the difference that those gardens are not designed to be lived in all the time — or with the ridiculous labyrinth in the Jardin des Plantes, at the entry to which is written (height of absurdity, Ariadne unemployed): No playing in the labyrinth.

This city could be envisaged in the form of an arbitrary assemblage of castles, grottos, lakes, etc. It would be the baroque stage of urbanism considered as a means of knowledge. But this theoretical phase is already outdated. We know that a modern building could be constructed which would have no resemblance to a medieval castle but which could preserve and enhance the Castle poetic power (by the conservation of a strict minimum of lines, the transposition of certain others, the positioning of openings, the topographical location, etc.).

The districts of this city could correspond to the whole spectrum of diverse feelings that one encounters by chance in everyday life.

Bizarre Quarter — Happy Quarter (specially reserved for habitation) — Noble and Tragic Quarter (for good children) — Historical Quarter (museums, schools) — Useful Quarter (hospital, tool shops) — Sinister Quarter, etc. And an Astrolarium which would group plant species in accordance with the relations they manifest with the stellar rhythm, a planetary garden along the lines the astronomer Thomas wants to establish at Laaer Berg in Vienna. Indispensable for giving the inhabitants a consciousness of the cosmic. Perhaps also a Death Quarter, not for dying in but so as to have somewhere to live in peace — I’m thinking here of Mexico and of a principle of cruelty in innocence that appeals more to me every day.

The Sinister Quarter, for example, would be a good replacement for those ill-reputed neighborhoods full of sordid dives and unsavory characters that many peoples once possessed in their capitals: they symbolized all the evil forces of life. The Sinister Quarter would have no need to harbor real dangers, such as traps, dungeons or mines. It would be difficult to get into, with a hideous decor (piercing whistles, alarm bells, sirens wailing intermittently, grotesque sculptures, power-driven mobiles, called Auto-Mobiles), and as poorly lit at night as it was blindingly lit during the day by an intensive use of reflection. At the center, the “Square of the Appalling Mobile.” Saturation of the market with a product causes the product’s market value to fall: thus, as they explored the Sinister Quarter, the child and the adult would learn not to fear the anguishing occasions of life, but to be amused by them.

The main activity of the inhabitants will be CONTINUOUS DRIFTING. The changing of landscapes from one hour to the next will result in total disorientation. . . .

Later, as the gestures inevitably grow stale, this drifting [dérive] will partially leave the realm of direct experience for that of representation. . . .

The economic obstacles are only apparent. We know that the more a place is set apart for free play, the more it influences people’s behavior and the greater is its force of attraction. This is demonstrated by the immense prestige of Monaco and Las Vegas — and of Reno, that caricature of free love — though they are mere gambling places. Our first experimental city would live largely off tolerated and controlled tourism. Future avant-garde activities and productions would naturally tend to gravitate there. In a few years it would become the intellectual capital of the world and would be universally recognized as such.

IVAN CHTCHEGLOV
1953

February 16, 2006

IFB Fight Club

Note: Because of the disorientating effect of the Bone Hole and Fight Club zones the writer cannot guarantee an exhaustively geographical accurate account of the ride.

Punk Rock Dad and I arrived to meet Messrs Routemartin and the Shaman in the normal-pub-carpark-type-of-fashion.

As bikes were fettled and injected with air I sensed little of the strange trip into 'organic' mountain biking to come.

The Shaman had acquired a new vehicle to guide us into the further regions: a light blue Inbred hardtail. Like some wise indigenous beast it would stalk the contorted universes of the zones with animal efficiency.

Aiding the progress of this journey into darkness was Routemartin aboard his red Spesh Epic, a thousand epic spins into nothingness etched across his face. Bone hole survivor and hooligan bike master PRD rode his Orange 5 while I straddled my sparkle silver Intense 5.5 – the bike I had joyously baptised on a trip through Duke's Cut near Hebden Bridge the previous weekend.

Leaving the quiet surrounds of the White Lion on the edge of Knowle Hill we began climbing to discover a pathway to the panoramic splendor of its peak.
We passed through a working but eerily deserted farmyard to gain access to a mysterious copse whose winding stair cast us into the zones.

A push up the bumpy grass to the summit gave us a Turneresque view of every dirty old town in the post-industrial vista.

Air painting gestures and ritual sign-making finally gave way to the descent into Bone Hole, known appropriately enough as Bone Hole Drop.

I was defeated by the surprising steepness of the plummet and I pathetically dabbed my way down when a confident arse behind-the seat-technique would have got me down in one piece.

Eventually arriving at an 'impasse' created by the invidious nature of the zones, the Shaman and Routemartin forced their way around the reservoir to Rooley Moor.

As the Shaman motioned towards a strip of singletrack that wound its magic down the contours of the moor, we passed into the next zone: Fight Club.

“This is the place I've been looking at ,” the Shaman said with a delighted look of pride, and we climbed up the strip to fire off from the tee.

In this realm, the normal laws of XC mountain biking were turned on their heads. Instead of the familiar impressions of a hundred ghost riders, tyres churned curdles of virgin soil as the bikes danced along multiple lines of singletrack.

In place of the disruptive restrictions of gates and fences was the freewheeling joy of plunging into open country – and all near Bacup.

It seemed the ultimate expression of what makes mountain biking grab a person like crack cocaine. A step into the unknown to find a place that, with one attentive caress, feels like home.

The path eventually scythed into a precipitous helter skelter but soon belched us out onto the safety and the sheer shambolic fun of the Rooley Moor Road.

Here we discovered the filthy detritus of those who fail to respect the zones. A fly-tipping builder had desecrated the land with a collection of materials leftover from some botched handy work. We turned enforcers and photographed the evidence: two missives bearing a women's address.

“So Miss Careless how did it come to pass that your details were discovered by mountain bikers on the Rooley Moor Road near Fight Club?

“You have shamed Albion and I sentence you to be hanged by an inner tube.”

Retching with hunger due to the exhausting physical nature of the other world I was soon comforted by the substances provided by Routemartin – a skillfully prepared egg and bacon butty. Next, moving forward past the only two bikers to be encountered on the route things picked up.

The Rooley's mosaic of gritty dirt, rocks, and broken paving, gave way to some of the best riding on the mission. “Down here,” cried PRD as he peeled off to the left to blitz another exciting descent. An out-of-control conveyor belt of ruts and slabs moved us towards Bacup where we were to pick up the path to the third zone: the quarry.

As we passed the check-point there was a sign warning of the evil inherent in the quarry zone. This, like something pulled from the sleeve of an in flight seat pouch (Fight Club reference No 50), took the form of a figure falling from a cliff.

A lone hooded figure, carrying what looked like a sniper rifle, stalked us from the beginning of the path to the quarry. Fortunately skillful riding allowed us to avoid the reaper's sights and we pushed on fuelled by adrenalin.

And indeed, the quarry zone, subject to a £90million 'extreme' bid to the zonal authorities, seemed to be waiting for the settlement of an 'adrenalin village'.

We encountered a slab of rock with the name Crusty Man, and as I blinked through sun flare, it appeared that the hooligan PRD was sketching his way down its almost vertical wall aboard his Five. Later, photographs proved that this 'hallucinogenic vision' was a reality.

After exploring the various permutations of the quarry we began descending to circumvent our progress and emerge from the zones unscathed.

Once more in need of bodily fuel I sucked upon the strange gel provided by a plastic tube and PRD pulled the wise smirk of the those who have already taken the 'Donkey Jizz'.

Invigorated by the fluid I tackled a flooded, descending path by riding high on its banks like an otter scuttling home with fish.




Jizzzed to the eyeballs I began to tackle an ascent as if I were the stalker leading the trip. But the effects of this short-lived high wound down and the soon, the rocks and the stones, and the climbs, and the air of the hills, and the roots, and barbed wire, and the Fight Club began to bring a great weariness.

Exhausted by the endurance of his spiritual guidance the Shaman bade farewell and headed for his tepee. Routemartin, PRD and I schlepped to the border between the zones and their security cordon.

Soon we were safe within the walls of a tavern which served a serious pint of Thwaites and an average burger. Routemartin rested back and said it was great day of riding. And, as he said it, the secrets of the zones fluttered away from his lips and faded behind his wind-lashed head like the smoke from a cigarette.

The ride was gone but in our heads, a nugget of its preciousness remained forever. It has been a great day of riding.

February 11, 2006

Fly tippers - is hanging too good for them?

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Discuss.

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February 06, 2006

Last time I go All Mountain

Sussing it out

Following last week's pathetic confession that my uncomfortable hardtail grapple with the Stoodley park rock garden has convinced me to search out a full susser, I feel compelled to bore you with the details of my first 'test' ride.

Foregoing PRD's offer of an Industrial marathon ride with No Pies and co I decided to ride an Enduro Expert I'd borrowed from NWMB on a shorter ride in the Peaks instead.

Naively, perhaps, we headed up a tricky climb to the base of Kinder Scout from Hayfield. I'm rode a large size version but struggled from the off and ended up pushing most of the way. At the time it felt like I'd have ascended better in a rowing boat. Bike shop mechanic and thinking man's man John tried it out and proved that it could climb.

Red-faced I pushed on, and felt more relieved to find myself at the head of a rutted, rocky descent than ever before.

The next few minutes were some of the most exhilarating of my mountain biking life. Beginning gingerly I soon warmed to the bike's astonishing abilities. Pining the trail , to my mind, I spied a loose rock and opted to just hit it full-on. It felt like I was crushing a huge rye bread by riding over it on a Harley Davidson.

Of course it was John who had really sliced it open on his Santa Cruz and we both grinned like demented fools when I finally reached the bottom.

Yet, for all its bulldozing strength on the downhill I wasn't convinced the Enduro was the bike for me.

It was probably too much of a step-up for a rider with my modest abilities. The large seemed too big and the medium too small. Also perplexing was the machine's reluctance to leave terra firma. When clipped into my hardtail it feels great to bunny hop obstacles and to crouch into the bike to launch it off terrain. But the Enduro just wants to crush everything in its path; it doesn't need to ignore gravity.

It looked so good standing in the kitchen after I'd savoured a couple of Islay malts with Charlie George and offspring Calum ( he's 10 and had Ribena by the way) on Friday night.

But for all its hydro-formed beauty and Fox Talas 36 R forks I have to admit I'd be foolish to take the beast into my home.

After storing the Enduro in the cellar alongside my Rockhopper I notcied that the huge brute had already taken to intimidating its younger cousin and worse, nicking his bird - Gina's barely used women's Hardrock Sport.

Although the Hardrock is the sort of lost kitten that lies in silk sheets eating chocolates in bed, I think she'd still prefer an honest ride with an XC bike than a roll with a surgically enhanced all-mountain beefcake.

So the other suitors still have a chance. The most likely candidate is an Intense Spider or 5.5 but IFB's custom-build king PRD is offering several alternative prosposals. In the end the Hardrock has to decide who going to be snuggling up to its back shifter in the quiet of the basement.

Who it will be I don't know. Any suggestions?